Jeffrey Rowland's OVERCOMPENSATING
topatoco

25 July 2006

Freefallin'



This begins a series of rapid-fire OC comics coming out this week, there's gonna be about six comics between now and Friday in which I relate to you my experiences at the 2006th Annual San Diego Comic-Con.

Here's the part I where advise you to never fly Delta Airlines if you can possibly avoid it. I landed in Atlanta half an hour after my connecting flight to San Diego departed because they overbooked the flight in Hartford and had to re-weigh the plane. After being told the next flight was at 8am (this was about 9pm in Atlanta) I was informed by a Delta service agent that there "ain't no more hotels in Atlanta" and I would need to spend the night in that miserable airport. I was standing in line with three women who were reduced to tears by Delta customer service. They need to change their slogan to "Delta. Cry, bitch. Cry."

I desperately pulled the "I will tell 50,000 people never to fly Delta Airlines again if you don't do something about this" card, and they didn't do anything about it, so here is me making good on that.

Never fly Delta Airlines if you can avoid it.

27 Comments:

Blogger Cos said...

But what of Joanna?!?!

25/7/06 15:29  
Blogger Hollando said...

Dude, for the future, if you live in MA, as you do, and are flying to CA, as you were, it is almost certainly worth the driving to drive to Manchester, NH or Providence and fly Southwest direct.

25/7/06 15:34  
Blogger Matthew said...

Yes, I second that motion. Delta is da stupid. Aren't they bankrupt by the way?

25/7/06 15:52  
Blogger Kirsten P. said...

Seeing as she is already dead, I wouldn't worry much about Joanna. Nothing worse could happen to her. Seriously, if I were a zombie I would take advantage of those opportunities.

25/7/06 15:59  
Blogger Tony said...

I was once told at 3pm, when they cancelled my flight, that the next flight they could put me on was 5am the next morning, because the rest of the flights for the day were booked. So I pitched a fit till they gave me a voucher for another airline, which was nice of them, I suppose. This was neither Delta nor Atlanta.

25/7/06 16:30  
Blogger gorman said...

Even Zombies can explode on impact, miss elizabeth.

25/7/06 16:43  
Blogger Darwin said...

I have never in my life had a good experience in the Atlanta airport, and I've flown into it on three different airlines. It's as if all the stupid from Atlanta has been concentrated in the air traffic control tower at the airport.

25/7/06 17:21  
Blogger Cullers said...

So did you sleep on the floor of the terminal ala Tom Hanks like I recently had to do in Minneapolis?

25/7/06 17:55  
Blogger Donovan S. Brain said...

I always stand way out in the hall and flush with a ten foot pole to avoid being blown out of the plane.

Getting that ten foot pole on the plane in the first place is the tough part.

25/7/06 17:56  
Blogger wade said...

Did you shave on the plane?

25/7/06 18:39  
Blogger Proteus said...

As an (Atlantan? Atlanian? Atlantean?) individual from Atlanta, I feel compelled to join in this discussion -- the problem is twofold; first that Atlanta-Hartsfield is the busiest (most flights in and out) airport in the US, if not the world. Whether you're departing or arriving there, if you don't have all your ducks in a row for that plane to get off the ground or into the gate on time, it ain't getting off at all. The second problem is that, as Matthew pointed out, Delta is undergoing "adjustments" at this time. So their employees are feeling small and freaked out (as an employee who's been laid off due to bankruptcy, you can tell when the axe is hovering). How can you expect people to do a good job when they think that they might be canned tomorrow?

So, somebody freaks out, lets their guard down, and makes a minor screwup. There's no time to correct for it (busiest airport, remember), so it ends up snowballing down the line until there's a massive problem at the end of it all. Happened to me -- my flight from Philly to Atlanta was canceled because they didn't hae time to fix the AC for the plane on the ground when it left there to arrive at Philly, and by the time it got there it was 110 degrees in the cabin.

25/7/06 19:37  
Blogger Proteus said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

25/7/06 19:37  
Blogger Dylan said...

I believe that it is still mandatory that they either put you up for the night or find you a flight that you can make on another airline. Either way, I fly Southwest when I can, because they don't dance around the fact that they are barebones.

25/7/06 20:29  
Blogger I'm Scooter, but I might be a troll. said...

Don't fly if you can possibly avoid it. Flying commercial is a miserable, stress filled, health hazardous act that does not need to be undertook.

Trains, people. Trains.

25/7/06 20:39  
Blogger Nobody Too said...

Uh, Scooter? Are you recommending AMTRAK? Seriously? Delta sucks, but Amtrak?

I have a nonstop Delta from my parents' home in Atlanta to mine in San Fran Friday. Wish me luck. Or don't. There's someone out there who deserves it more than I.

25/7/06 21:27  
Blogger JP said...

I find that almost all airlines suck. I have had a bad experience on almost every one I have flown on. And don't even get me started on the TSA assholes.
Sadly if you are bicoastal, the train is not a reasonable alternative; it is both 10 times slower, and 5 times the price.

25/7/06 22:45  
Blogger N said...

Alas, I'm a Skymiles member with some 40,000 miles on me. I can't quit now, can I? =P

25/7/06 23:36  
Blogger jeffrey rowland said...

The flight from San Diego back to Atlanta had no A/C from what I could tell, everyone was sweating all night.

On the way out of San Diego when we were waiting at the terminal this guy beside me freaked out and just got off the plane and didn't come back. His seat was instantly given to a fat white man who had been on standby.

Better cash in those miles soon, Nam.

26/7/06 00:06  
Blogger Yuki W. said...

I'm working in a travel agency now, and one joke about Delta is that it stands for:
Don't
Expect
Luggage
To
Arrive. We don't sell delta too much. or at all.

26/7/06 00:37  
Blogger jeffrey rowland said...

Shiney, you gotta tell me if you ain't got your book yet! Sometimes me or the post office messed up.

Email help@topatoco.com if you have anything like this.

26/7/06 00:48  
Blogger Reverend Andre Brothel said...

Jeffy Jeffy Jeffy... No matter how bad a corporate service is, there is one rule of civilty that must be obeyed: Don't make threats to get what you want. No matter what the scenario is, as soon as you say "or I will do something" you are dead wrong & deserve whatever shaft you're riding. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with telling everyone not to fly Delta (you go with your bad self!), I'm saying that if they ever capitulated to that threat then every customer being polite to those employees instead of trying to intimidate them would be getting twice the shaft.

26/7/06 15:38  
Blogger jeffrey rowland said...

Don't make threats to get what you want.

The shaft was already fully implanted and was being twisted at this point. I don't say things like that ever and it was only when I was treated like a subhuman that it came out. The Delta employees made three grown women cry in three separate instances.

26/7/06 17:02  
Blogger thevalrus said...

Between Ze Frank's admonishment and yours, I doubt anyone who enjoys funny things will want to fly Delta.

26/7/06 17:16  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Delta's subsidiary Sun Country is the anti-Delta. I originally chose them because they happened to have the lowest fare, and I discovered their amazing service. They serve hot sandwiches, not a little bag of 6 pretzels. And one time when I checked in, the counter guy said "Oh, you're kind of tall. I bet you'd like some extra leg room. Can I seat you in an exit row?" I'm not making that up.

26/7/06 18:39  
Blogger timdesuyo said...

I've been pretty lucky. When I fly, I fly vegan. It's really important for them not to screw up the meals, as most of my flights have been ORD-KIX. United ain't luxury, but they only messed up the meals once, and they did a good job of apologizing.

28/7/06 00:47  
Blogger Al said...

Deregulation happened nearly 30 years ago and the penalties that airlines pay for bumped travelers haven't changed thereby creating greater incentive to bumping passengers. Expect more bumping in the future. This hasn't been a problem because of crazy cheap oil prices in the 90's but now that oil prices have returned to normal and are now heading north, get ready to be bumped more often.

22/7/07 23:12  
Blogger mayor said...

I know this is more than a year ago but I can't help but to chime in on the misconceptions and lies I've seen on here. First, Delta employees don't "always go on strike" as someone asserted. Delta pilots (and a small group of dispatchers) are the only union groups at Delta and neither one has ever gone on strike nor have the other employees ever done so.
Second, Sun Country is not not now or ever has been a subsidiary of Delta.
I don't know where you people get your information or are you so caught up in the "screw Delta" fever that you make up lies just to be one of the gang?

17/2/08 12:26  

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